Ever alert for the call to action

Too hot for my liking. I wish it was winter again.


The trouble with realising that you're dreaming is that you wake up. That's my experience, anyway. As soon as I realise I'm dreaming I'm awake.


I had a dream once, but I didn't know it was a dream at the time. I was bitten by a snake, then realised it was harmless and laughed hysterically. The I woke up. I think the symbolism there is obvious. The snake stick of Moses, the crucifixion of Christ (the death of sin on the accursed tree, which is prefigured by the staff of Moses).


I normally find it easy enough to interpret my dreams, they come from my head after all. Not counting messages from God, of course. I don't think retardsman knowns as much as he makes out. As Frankie Howard said in Carry On Doctor, "what is mind, no matter; what is matter, never mind".


I like the interweb. Good place ot find things out, although not the only one. I haven't finished Private Eye, yet. On the list of bad things about being on a New Deal programme that's just behind having to shift heavy bags and boxes up and down stairs in boiling hot weather. No time to read. But I've spotted something interesting. The three government cronies arrested in the cash-for-honours affair didn't have their DNA taken. This is probably just typical favourable treatment of the government's mates, but perhaps not. Who knows what might turn up if these persons' DNA profiles got into the government DNA database. Who knows what they've been up to and what forensic traces they've left behind. They don't take DNA after every arrest, the police say. Well, obviously not, but they'd take mine if I was arrested and they'd take yours too.

Talking of pretty women, I've not normally been into cartoon women but I did once see a thread on the subject on the Straight Dope message board and the only two contenders as far as I'm concerned are the bitch from "Dog City" and Nico (papa...) from the computer game "Broken Sword: Shadow of the Templars. (Known in America and Broken Sword: Circle of Blood, for no apparent reason.)

Sticking with cartoons... Banana man. I don't suppose he's got another name in America. Too centred around bananas, probably created by the Banana Marketing Board. It's Britain's favourite fruit, by a distance - the custard cream of the fruit world. I understand America only has one type of biscuit, not called a biscuit, and therefore talk of gypsy creams and custard creams, hob-nobs and digestives will be lost on them. Pity, really. Jammy Dodgers, too. Rich Teas. Good biscuits. I see there's such a website as nicecupofteaandasitdownaswell.com, which is nice. Reminds me of a newsgroup I used to post in many moons back: alt.chips.salt-n-vinegar. The consensus was that this was the American use of the word "chips", meaning crisps, but most of the users of the group were English meaning the English usage was just as well accepted. That group died, I think, same goes for alt.dont.get.even.get.odd, which was good for a time. Now, where was I? Right, yes, custard creams have been many times voted biscuit of the year. Deserve it, too. Terrific, that bananaman. All the best satire or parody can be taken straight, like Nebulous on the radio. Apparently a kid came up to Orwell one day and asked why those pigs were so cruel. Orwell was over the moon, because he realised that it was most important the book was good enough that even a kid without education would enjoy it as a straight story,not just someone who understood the political parts.

"This is 29 Acacia Road.
"And this is Eric, the schoolboy who leads an exciting double-life.
"For when Eric eats a banana, an amazing transformation occurs.
"Eric is Bananaman, ever alert for the call to action."
-- Bananaman, BBC